@b-j-conlee said in Paul McCartney- New Album for 2023:
Hey Nancy. I understand totally about your frustration. In my father's last couple of years, he had dimentia real bad. I brought my Dad down from New Jersey to Florida where his Sister lived. I wanted to retire anyway and my Father could no longer take the winters up North so we moved. Anyway, the first couple of years it was very frustrating. We would drive at the end of the year from New Jersey to Florida (a long 2 Day drive). After a couple of days he would go into his sister's house (only 3 houses down from our house) and tell my aunt (his sister) that he was leaving to go home because he wanted to go to my Mom's grave site in NJ. One year he left in our car and preceded to get lost. Fortunately for me, he only got to the next town. Talk about being frustrating. It was all about his dimentia. He couldn't understand that he wanted to go back home and that it was already Winter which is why we moved in the first place.
My Father lived to 90 and in retrospect, it was good
we moved. On the whole he had a good few years down in Florida. Now when I look back I should have had more patience with him. The dimentia he had did cause a few headaches for me but still l should of had more patience. My Daughter reminds me how good he was (and my Mother) were to her. My Mom and Father were not only great parents but great grandparents too. These days I miss both of them so much. How lucky my sister and I were. I realize that especially when I hear stories from friends about their parents. We were so lucky!
I brought my dad down from Ohio in June 2013 to Assisted Living because he had broken his hip, still needed vsome rehab and needed someone to give him all of his many pills (he’d never been on a jet plane before and he was 87! His mind was sharp as a tack until the end (Jan. 6, 2016 at just shy of 90) His body just gave out with COPD, mitral valve regurgitation and kidney failure. My mom is 92 and takes meds for high B/P and high cholesterol, but other than being pre-diabetic, she is physically okay, it’s just the dementia that got so bad over the last year or so. It actually began with little bits of short-term memory loss in 2018. Rather than have to move her twice (once to Assisted Living & again to a nursing home which is next door to it) I’m trying to keep her where she is. They feed them 3 meals plus snacks, coffee, tea, ice cream, etc. between meals and do their housekeeping. She is still able to do her own laundry, but if need be, I could do that. They have an on-site company that gives her her 7:45am meds and tells her to go eat breakfast. She’s always up real early and can shower & dress herself. It costs $9/day but is cheaper than moving her to A.L. Besides the hassle plus renting a truck, the monthly cost would be $4130 as opposed to the $3365 she pays now. In about a year, her savings will run out and if I can get a letter from her PCP or neurologist, she could go to the nursing home and get on Medicaid. She would give the facility her Social Security and tiny pension each month and Medicaid would pay whatever they decide to pay. I would have to “just” pay the first month which right now is $8400!
Bound to increase in one year!
Oh, and she has to take pills 2 other times during the day and we finally got the battery powered pill dispenser (they sent a 2nd one) to work (rotate) properly! It’s been since Mar. 6th we’ve been pulling our hair out over this thing. I still call her at 12:10pm to remind her to go eat lunch, at 5pm for her 5:05 pills and go to dinner and at 7:30pm for her evening pills. She goes to bed super early, like 8 or 8:30.
I guess I rambled on enough! I definitely need more patience too, but sadly it is not one if my virtues! It’s a constant struggle.