"Penguin" & other songs by illwobble
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illwobble:
dance-tonight:
"Killing Time" is okay, but I don't know, to me it lacks something. Maybe in the lyrics or in the tune.
Fair enough. I mean like I say it is supposed to be a rocker really. The "chorus" (the bit where I just sing "killing time" 4 times) is certainly a bit weak as is, and that's where I'd want some nice heavy guitar riffs to bring in some excitement.
dance-tonight:
"Escape" is really great, like the acoustic tune and the lyrics are really nice, you shouldn't change them much.
Good to hear. No, I was only aiming for a few little tweaks. Not very happy with the final verse which I just wrote in a rush to get something down.(
Would be definitely interesting to hear that. I like the final verse nearly the most. It's really reflective and true.
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And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one! -
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Crazy song illwobble! I'll listen more later and give ya some feedback
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kapoo:
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Crazy song illwobble! I'll listen more later and give ya some feedback
Don't feel like you HAVE to!
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illwobble:
kapoo:
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Crazy song illwobble! I'll listen more later and give ya some feedback
Don't feel like you HAVE to!
Wow man, I just had a total epiphany.. you'll think I'm nuts but think about playing that song, and even keeping all Magnus's guitar chords pretty much, but playing it to the same type beat of this classic
or something like Phish's Bathtub Gin, that beat. I can totally see it! I love the _if I had a melon.._part, I'd say keep that exact even if you did change the beat/tempo of the other parts, would still work. I'll give you this, I like where your heads at, showing no fear in the songwriting reaching, towards complete lunacy. thats fine, but peeps gonna think you're strange strange is sort of a funny descriptive term to use there. its so open to the imagination, whats strange to you. Good work man, tell Magnus I/we say good work! -
kapoo:
illwobble:
kapoo:
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Crazy song illwobble! I'll listen more later and give ya some feedback
Don't feel like you HAVE to!
Wow man, I just had a total epiphany.. you'll think I'm nuts but think about playing that song, and even keeping all Magnus's guitar chords pretty much, but playing it to the same type beat of this classic
or something like Phish's Bathtub Gin, that beat. I can totally see it! I love the _if I had a melon.._part, I'd say keep that exact even if you did change the beat/tempo of the other parts, would still work. I'll give you this, I like where your heads at, showing no fear in the songwriting reaching, towards complete lunacy. thats fine, but peeps gonna think you're strange strange is sort of a funny descriptive term to use there. its so open to the imagination, whats strange to you. Good work man, tell Magnus I/we say good work!Thanks so much KPU! I see what you're getting at with that I'm The Greatest beat, I think. Might work. Not all that keen to do much more to this one though to be honest, not for now anyway. Unlike any of the songs I've done so far, I'm afraid I have to admit I don't really like it that much. It was an enjoyable experiment anyway. Glad you like the "If I had a melon" bit. That was a nonsense song I wrote for Deb before we got married. I thought I'd try to incorporate it in a bigger arrangement that had lots of tempo changes time signature changes - inspired by McCartney songs like Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey, I think, with all those different bits working together so brilliantly. Anyway, several other lyrics come from things I've said to Deb over the years, mainly late at night when I start to get a little weird! . So Deb's a bit uneasy about the song since it's basically loads of things I've said to her transplanted onto some other persona that isn't me... We performed this live the other night too! Fortunately perhaps, I don't think many people were listening, as it was in a noisy pub with a lot of noise! They probably noticed the clucking at the end and not much else!!
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audi:
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Charming, hilarious and 100% uniquely YOU.
Wow, thank you audi!!
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illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Charming, hilarious and 100% uniquely YOU.
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audi:
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Charming, hilarious and 100% uniquely YOU.
Wow, thank you audi!! Yes, I can't imagine anyone else coming up with it, that's true. Or even singing it really...
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illwobble:
audi:
illwobble:
And now for something completely different: I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange
I've tried for something with a more complex arrangement, with several bits incorporated. Not sure how well I've pulled it off. Honest opinions, please! I quite understand if you don't get - or hate - this one!Charming, hilarious and 100% uniquely YOU.
Wow, thank you audi!!
It's got "cult fave" status written all over it.
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I really like this song. Again it reminds me of The Kinks, the change in tempo and the whole tune. Like a mix of "Dedicated Follower of Fashion" and Monty Python's "Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life". And your voice sounds again like Ray Davies-voice. Great song!
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...someone challenged me to write a song about "magic peas" ... Btw, thanks, dance-tonight for your kind words about I Hope You Don't Think I'm Too Strange!
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illwobble:
...someone challenged me to write a song about "magic peas" ...
And here it is! Something a bit different once again. Kind of children's story sung in a different accent and sped up. Slightly rough demo, but ok.
Lyrics: Now Nigel never ate his greens He only wanted pie and chips and ketchup So his Mum gave him a plate of peas And told him he'd get nothing else 'till he ate them all up Inevitably Nigel had a better idea So while his mother wasn't looking, he tried to make them disappear He hid them down his trousers and under his chair Assuming that those peas would then no longer be there But they were magic peas! And they just kept on spreading and multiplying Magic peas! And the more those peas appeared the more Nigel was crying Now Nigel never saw so many peas They were spilling off the table and filling up the whole room So his mother said, ?Oh Nigel, please!? ?This is getting out of hand! Why don't you just eat some?? Inevitably Nigel didn't like that idea But as those peas kept multiplying they reached up to his ears Some got into his mouth and Nigel swallowed He thought ?ooh, that's quite tasty?, and do you know what followed? They were magic peas! And Nigel felt just grand! It was electrifying! Magic peas! And as his feet came off the ground, next thing Nigel was flying! Now Nigel flew and whizzed and twirled He took off out of his house and kept soaring higher He flew half way around the world He saw giant waterfalls, and mountains of fire Inevitably Nigel had to come home finally He was getting very hungry. It was nearly time for tea Since there were still quite a lot left, his Mum gave him some peas He gobbled them all up and said ?could I have some more, please?? 'Cos they were magic peas! They just kept on spreading and multiplying Magic peas! Nigel ate them every day, and then Nigel went flying. -
And here's a demo of another new song, called "Am I Wrong?"
Lyrics: You don't seem too happy to me, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? You look like you need to break free, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? Your worries are dragging you under The joy has drained out of your face Do you need me to take you away, love? Away from this place? I don't like to see you this way, love Is it me? Is it me? Or did something bad happen today, love? Leave it be. Leave it be I'd hate to think I might have trapped you by bringing you here to this place And I'd hate you to be held back through my thoughtless mistakes I don't think it's really so bad, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? There's really no need to be sad, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? But if you really think you can't take it, you only have to say We could leave this behind and together fly away, fly away You don't seem too happy to me, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? You look like you need to break free, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? -
Damn, you been busy! Man, I absolutely love Magic Peas, and I have to tell you when you told me the idea at first I was thinking 'don't do it' but I love what you did with the melody, love the chord changes as it flows through the verses, you go minors to majors, and then into that funky guitar, with melody to boot the whole time!! and I swear, this is only after 1 and a half listens good stuff man. and great call speeding it up! I would be interested to hear the slow one, I presume the original. did you go into it intending or thinking you might speed it up that way? worked great. Not so much of a fan of the other song. it dragged a little for me. If I'm creatively spitballing it, I think you should make the verses denser somehow, like get through the lines faster and add more, with more words and variance in the melody. probably do away with the parts that repeat 'is it me? is it me? / am I wrong? etc., maybe try to find a different 'hook'. In otherwords complete re-write I'm so just kidding Jon, the thing that ends up selling your slower songs like this one, is that lyrically you're saying something. so it ends up working, for some listeners more than others. its funny cause on the flipside you also have a couple melodies I think could work better with different lyrics. Grasshoppers the big one for me. I think its a great melody, but lyrics I personally wouldn't normally listen to. the trick is getting it to match up. I've found its always about the music really. lyrics can be anything. very rarely though will great lyrics save dull music. however, Magnus is on point with the broken chords he does. nice rhythm to it.
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kapoo:
Damn, you been busy! Man, I absolutely love Magic Peas, and I have to tell you when you told me the idea at first I was thinking 'don't do it' but I love what you did with the melody, love the chord changes as it flows through the verses, you go minors to majors, and then into that funky guitar, with melody to boot the whole time!! and I swear, this is only after 1 and a half listens good stuff man. and great call speeding it up! I would be interested to hear the slow one, I presume the original. did you go into it intending or thinking you might speed it up that way? worked great.
Yes, most people I told had a similar reaction, I think!! I'm so glad you liked it. Yes I did imagine it sped up Chipmunk-style from the start, pretty much - or at least wanted to experiment with it. I can send you the original not sped up if you like? Shame about a couple of vocal slips on the track but I'll give it another shot some time hopefully. The funky guitar is Magnus's idea really. I often struggle to explain to him what I want if it's not what I'm looking for, but usually he comes up with something better once I get to listening back to the recording.
kapoo:
Not so much of a fan of the other song. it dragged a little for me. If I'm creatively spitballing it, I think you should make the verses denser somehow, like get through the lines faster and add more, with more words and variance in the melody. probably do away with the parts that repeat 'is it me? is it me? / am I wrong? etc., maybe try to find a different 'hook'. In otherwords complete re-write I'm so just kidding Jon, the thing that ends up selling your slower songs like this one, is that lyrically you're saying something. so it ends up working, for some listeners more than others. its funny cause on the flipside you also have a couple melodies I think could work better with different lyrics. Grasshoppers the big one for me. I think its a great melody, but lyrics I personally wouldn't normally listen to. the trick is getting it to match up. I've found its always about the music really. lyrics can be anything. very rarely though will great lyrics save dull music. however, Magnus is on point with the broken chords he does. nice rhythm to it.
Really glad you're able to give proper honest feedback, and I think you're largely right. I didn't put much effort into the lyrics for this one, and I could hack out a verse maybe to shorten it, and reshape some of the lyrics. I really love Magnus's guitar on this one, especially between the verses, and again that was only really listening back that I noticed how good it was. Best thing about it. I certainly mucked up the whistling bit... As for Grasshopper, maybe you're right again. Feel free to write your own lyrics to it if you feel inclined!! I think I care a bit more about lyrics than you do but I can't really argue with your general point about music and melody.
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You know I love talkin muzak! looking back at my suggestions on your song Am I Right? its totally obvious why I write in the style I do, really wordy right! I'm always looking for bounce in the melody, lots of obvious rhythm. glad my ideas are well taken, I considered not posting all that but figured you'd appreciate it like I do you're a prolific song writer right now! thanks for sending the other btw, I actually like that one too! I think you got the tempo right though on the faster one.
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Agree mostly with kapoo (apart from the part that I most of the time, for me the music is way more important than the lyrics). But I really like the first song and think there is something missing in the second one.
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illwobble:
And here's a demo of another new song, called "Am I Wrong?"
Lyrics: You don't seem too happy to me, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? You look like you need to break free, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? Your worries are dragging you under The joy has drained out of your face Do you need me to take you away, love? Away from this place? I don't like to see you this way, love Is it me? Is it me? Or did something bad happen today, love? Leave it be. Leave it be I'd hate to think I might have trapped you by bringing you here to this place And I'd hate you to be held back through my thoughtless mistakes I don't think it's really so bad, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? There's really no need to be sad, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? But if you really think you can't take it, you only have to say We could leave this behind and together fly away, fly away You don't seem too happy to me, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong? You look like you need to break free, love Am I wrong? Am I wrong?I love this song. I first read the lyrics and decided I must listen to the song. It really is lovely. wow. In this song, as it is the first I have listened to so far, your voice reminds me some of Greg Lake of ELP. Nice guitar and whistling too.
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hey_kittay:
I love this song. I first read the lyrics and decided I must listen to the song. It really is lovely. wow. In this song, as it is the first I have listened to so far, your voice reminds me some of Greg Lake of ELP. Nice guitar and whistling too.
Thank you so much for listening, and delighted you like this one! Especially since the only other people who commented on it so far didn't like it much. I probably will tweak it a bit but I do like it so glad someone else does. It's basically from the heart, anyway, written for my wife more than my other songs were. I want to write something nearly as beautiful as the song she wrote with words from the Bible from the Song of Solomon:
If you like "Am I Wrong?" (which is, btw, a working title I might change), I suppose the others of mine you're most likely to enjoy would be Penguin, Lovers Once and Panda Bear, but that's just a guess as those are the ones probably most similar in style, and my songs are fairly varied. Hope you enjoy some of my other songs anyway! Thanks again!